Public Eye

One of the more popular online scams these days is the pet con, in which a person advertises puppies for sale on the Internet, someone falls for it and buys a dog that doesn’t exist. We receive ad placement requests from these crooks all the time and have become adept at spotting them. For instance, Don Mikey, address unknown, but probably Nigeria, Cameroon (isn’t that some kind of cookie?) or some other place where they probably eat dogs anyway, just this week sent an e-mail asking us to place an ad offering Yorkie puppies for sale. Call me skeptical, but something in his message caught my eye. See if you can spot it, too: “2 teacup yorkies (male and female) needs rehoming, they are both AKC registered, if you are interested kindly send an e-mail to ... they have current shorts.” I don’t know about anyone else, but after years of editing and writing, I know that it should be “NEED rehoming” not “NEEDS rehoming.” Clearly, this gentleman does not know his English and I say that’s suspicious. Besides, it’s my opinion that rehoming should be hyphenated — re-homing — just as you would spell “re-dog” if you were to write back to this person and say, “Yes, I would like one of your Yorkies because I have been thinking about re-dogging by home.” Moreover, everyone knows you don’t start a sentence with a numeral unless you’re writing about a brand name such 9-Lives cat food, which you might do if you were placing an order or telling your friends and family that you have recently re-catted and have to re-pantry something for it to eat. Incidentally, it is true, having been a re-catter myself in the past, that a cat will re-eat, but that’s as far as I’m going to go on the subject. But as regards Mr. Mikey — I bet that’s not his real name — I don’t get how this person would expect anyone to believe him when, in addition to using bad grammar, he also appears to be oblivious to the logistical problems involved in re-homing these fine animals. He must think we’re idiots on this side of the ocean. I mean, it’s a long flight from Africa to the U.S. and puppies will do what puppies do. His puppies’ shorts might be current when they leave, but they won’t be current by the time they arrive.